Soul Alchemy
by zenith020388
Summary: Two brothers. Two lives. Can a relationship between souls survive a change in reality? Can one cope with changes he caused to the other? And what will new life bring? Post Anime, Pre Film. FemEd. Nopair Yet
1. Before the Gate

**Prologue: Before the Gate**

It wasn't like the last time. He didn't pass through the gate. There was no pain, no sudden rush of knowledge or understanding. Nothing. Just him, the gate, and empty white. Why was he here? What purpose kept him from the end? Why was he not rejoining his family? His mother, and, if the attempt had failed, his brother. Grandparents that he never knew. His best friend, who died helping him towards his ultimate goal.

But no. Gleaming white-gold and black, the gate simply stood, and let him contemplate the infinite white expanse.

Edward Elric was dead. And he knew it.

He looked up at the object that had completely destroyed his life, and his brother's along with it. The price it extracted, and the lives they had led in an attempt to right their wrongs. He looked back on all of it, and he finally allowed himself to do something he'd been holding in for far, _far_ too long.

Edward Elric was dead. And he wept.

* * *

The air crackled as lightning struck again, nearer still than the last strike had been. The figure shook his head, returning his attention to the array that lay upon the ground before him. He'd spent years doing the research, and another doing the calculations. Hell, making sure the array was perfect had taken him the better part of a week itself. But now he was sure. And he was ready. 

Tonight, Alphonse Elric would be reunited with his brother.

* * *

Edward didn't know how long he sat there. Hours. Days. Weeks. Time had little meaning to him as he lamented the life he'd destroyed. All the lives he had touched, and ruined. Mustang. Hughes. Winry. Teacher. Nina... 

All of them might still be alive had it not been for his involvement. Once more his mind returned to the beginning of the cycle, but this time, something made him stop.

The gate let out a thunderous clunk, and it opened, letting golden light spill out over his stunned face. Figures stepped out of the light, figures that had haunted his dreams for years. And he knew that it was his time. He stood slowly, looking into eyes he had never expected to see again. His mother was there. She reached out a luminescent hand to gently wipe a tear from her son's cheek, smiling in a way that made Ed's heart flutter. "My boy..." She said softly, and Edward couldn't stop himself.

"Momma!"

Trisha Elric held her crying son tightly, enjoying the embrace that had been denied to him at such a young age. The young man that stood before her was nothing short of a hero, and she knew it. She was so proud of her boys, and she said so as they stood there."I love you, my precious Edward. With all my heart, I do." She whispered into his ear, and his happy sobs slowed for a time, and again they stood in near silence. But after a moment or an eternity, she released him from her grasp and stepped back, a slightly sad expression adorning her radiant face. "But you are not quite finished yet." The gate creaked again, the doors slowly starting to inch closed.

Edward panicked, reaching out and grabbing for his mother's hand, but he came up slightly short, and her body melted back into the golden light. "NO! MOTHER!"

Her voice drifted to his ears as the gate clanged shut, soft and ethereal, but full of sorrow and joy at the same time. "You still have work to do, Edward... Take care of your brother, and tell him I love him... And try to find happiness this time..."

The gate was shut, and Edward Elric was alone again.

Edward Elric was dead.

But not for long.

The gate gave another tiny creak, but this time it opened in one huge burst, and instead of golden light, there was nothing. Nothing but inky black abyss. And the eyes...

Edward Elric was dead. But he would live again.

But only after the pain...

* * *

Alphonse howled as he felt his legs dissolve into nothingness, leaving only bloody stumps where they had been. He started to shiver as he immediately went into shock, but he held his focus on the array that shone blindingly in the room before him. This was Human Alchemy. The ultimate Taboo. He had expected he would loose something in the exchange, and was prepared to pay that price. But as he watched the energy that surged through the room slowly dissipate, and he saw a mass of golden blonde hair come into view, his heart gave a mighty leap. "E-Ed?!" He cried, shivering even as the words left him. But as he watched, it became clear to him that something had gone wrong. 

There was blood everywhere. On the floor, some on the walls, and some clinging to the huge pools of golden hair that was attached to a face that most definitely did not belong to his brother. Her face was thin, gaunt even, and it was twisted into a mask of utter agony as the girl struggled to stop shaking. Had Al not been in excruciating pain himself, he would have noticed that the girl was stark naked, and seen curves that would suggest a very finely-sculpted body, and he would have blushed and looked away, as honest and innocent as he was. He would have seen the missing right arm and left leg, bloody ragged stumps to match his own where limbs should have been. He would have seen the scars of a hundred or more battles that dotted the girl... No. The _young woman's_ entire body.

But he didn't notice these sights. His eyes were locked on hers, a pair of molten gold irises that stared straight into his soul. Eyes that showed years of pain, and of effort and caring and hating and loving. He saw a pair of eyes that definitely didn't belong to the body they were in. She stared at him, accusing and thanking and pleading and condemning, for another few seconds before she opened her mouth and spoke in a wavering soprano voice that was barely holding back a scream.

"What did you _do_, little brother?"

And then she passed out.

* * *

A/N: Okay. All, and I do mean ALL, credit for the creation of this story goes to silkendreammaid and her excellent story "Returning Echoes", which inspired me to write this. I have a curse that makes my muse buzz with ideas when I read a new or interesting plot device (FemEd being the inspiration here). I hate myself for it. But I need to get it out of my head. So R&R, like I always ask, and I'll get to work on the rest of it. Stay frosty. -E. Red 


	2. After the Storm

**Chapter 1: After the Storm**

It was purely by coincidence that Winry Rockbell had been looking out the window, daydreaming about the two brothers that had affected her life so profoundly. The pair that she had grown up watching, and knowing would go so much farther than she ever could have. The man she had...

Another bolt of lightning lit up the sky, and she shook her head, clearing the unpleasant thought from her head. _Not today, Winry..._ She thought bitterly, wiping away the one tear that managed to sneak out of her. _He's not coming bac-_

There was another flash of light on the horizon, and if she hadn't been looking, she would surely have missed it. It wasn't lightning. It didn't even come out of the sky. It flashed out of the ground and hung in the air for several seconds, a rich violet haze that shone even through the rainstorm, before slowly receding back from where it had come from.

Winry stood up in shock. That light had come from the ruins of...

"GRANNY!" She screamed, turning and rushing for her coat and shoes. "GRANNY!!!"

"What!?" Her grandmother called from the top of the stairs, peering down at her granddaughter curiously. "What's got you all riled up?"

"Someone's using alchemy out in the storm!" The younger woman said franticly, struggling with her shoe.

"And why-"

Winry looked straight into her grandmother's eyes. "It's at the Elrics."

Pinako's eyebrows shot over the rims of her glasses. "Go. I'll get the sherrif."

But Winry was already out the door, dashing into the storm.

_Keep her away from the house, Granny..._ Pinako sighed. "What did you do, Alphonse?" She looked down the stairs towards the closet, where she'd stashed a larger-than normal medkit. "I better take that too..."

* * *

Winry ran up the hill, ignoring the rain and the wind that bit at her through the thin coat. She ignored the pain in her cramping legs. And she ignored the pain that grew in her heart as she drew nearer and nearer to the old, burnt-out shell of the Elric house. The place where their tragedy had begun... 

Someone had built a small trapdoor into the charred floorboards, that much was plain to see as she stepped over a mass of burned... Something. The charred floorboards that were now nowhere to be seen. In their place was a massive cavern, a wide room, perfectly square and ten feet deep. A huge arcane circle was physically gouged into the stone floor, lines and words and patterns that absolutely coated virtually the entire surface. The inch-deep grooves in the floor were already filled with water, from the rain, and as another thunderbolt cracked in thebackground, she could see the two figures that lay in the center of the room.

Her heart stopped. It took less than a second for her mind to register the pair as blondes, one much larger than the other. Her throat went dry immediately, and she no longer felt the cold as she stepped down the last stone step and into the chamber. The sound of the rain dissapeared for a minute, and all she could hear was the gurgling chuckle that came from the larger of the two figures. He was closer, and clearly conscious, so she went to him first.

And her heart stopped again. It was Alphonse. He was shaking and convulsing slightly, but above all else, he was laughing. And when his steel-grey eyes met hers, he redoubled his laughter. There was a sickly burning smell in the air, but she ignored it in favour of the eighteen-year old man that lay before her. "Al?" She managed to whisper after a second's hesitation.

"I d-did it, W-Winry..." He laughed. "I b-brought him-m back... And n-now he's gonna k-ill m-me!"

And her heart stopped a third time. Him...

She turned. And stared. And stared some more. "Al...?"

"It's him..." Al confirmed, still laughing erratically. "Or m-maybe... Her."

Winry fainted.

* * *

The Sherrif proved to have a rather weak stomach when Pinako arrived on the scene. The portly man had emptied his stomach onto the floor almost as soon as he had seen the bloody pair. Al had finally succumbed to the shock and passed out, and it was lucky that the Sherrif's sons had come along, because Pinako and the out of shape sherrif certainly could not have moved the unconscious teenagers down the hill and into the house on their own. Winry was left on the couch in the sherrif's care, but Al and the other girl were moved into the houses surgical room. 

Pinako was more than mildly disgusted by what she saw when she unwrapped the crudely ripped bandages that someone had tied around the stumps that had been Alphonse's legs. Evidently, somebody had crudely cauterized the wounds with an extremely intense heat. Quickly checking the girl, who was also wrapped in what appeared to be Al's coat, she confirmed that the same had been done to her missing limbs. The old lady sighed heavily, prepping the girl, who was in slightly worse condition, for surgery. She would have to amputate what little was left of her arm and leg in order to ensure that it was correctly done.

"ED!"

Pinako twitched. Winry had charged into the room, tears streaming down her cheeks, and gone straight to the girl. The elderly mechanic frowned. "Winry." She said sternly. "Wash up and come help, or get out. I won't have you in here if you're hallucinating."

Winry felt herself shaking as she stared at the girl. If what Al had said was true... The resemblance was there. A little bit in the face, and scars matching those that she'd seen on Ed's body while working on his automail... She gasped, looking a little closer at the girls face again. Something had startled her out of her tears, and she panicked, rushing out of the room, pushing past Rose, who had been awakened by the noise.

"Winry?" Rose asked, confused. "Miss Pinako, what... Alphonse?!" And she was immediately at his side. "What happened?!"

Pinako sighed again. This would be a long night...

And it was. The sun was just crawling up above the horizon by the time both patients were stabilized. There had been some problems during the amputations, and Pinako had sent the Sherrif and his boys to a hospital in a nearby town to fetch some blood, as both of them would need a transfusion to recover fully from the blood loss. They would be back by midday, if they made good time, so the elderly mechanic had Winry and Rose move the girl into another recovery room, and Winry hadn't left her side since.

Rose was mystified by the strange young woman that had appeared seemingly from nowhere. She seemed awfully familliar, but there was nothing about her that she recognised. Winry sat silently by the bedside, not moving save to wipe away the occasional tear that escaped her. Only when Pinako forced her out did she leave.

Pinako watched her granddaughter leave before turning back to the unconscious girl. In the frantic activity of the previous night, she'd been entirely focused on keeping the young pair alive. But now, after a few hours of rest and in a calm, quiet environment, she looked the girl over for the first time. She was small, even for a young woman, but Pinako could see toned muscles in her torso, and her remaining arm and leg. She had larger than average curves, her hips flaring out of a thin waist, and her chest filling out the paper gown rather completely. Her limbs were long and soft, tapering gently into slender fingers and toes. Scars dotted her entire body, a cut here, a puncture wound there. But it was her face that made Pinako gasp. The young woman was the spitting image of Trisha Elric. Save for the long blonde hair, which Rose had washed the blood out of the night before, Pinako could hardly distinguish the young woman that lay on her recovery bed from the sad woman who had lived up the hill, all those years ago.

The Rockbell matriarch had to sit down in shock. Alphonse... Alchemy... And Winry's pained cry when she had burst into the operating room...

It was a long half hour before she calmed herself back to a rational state. Pinako finally smiled, after a long period of shock. "Well. I guess they finally accomplished their task..." She stood slowly, absently straightening her smock. "Welcome home, Edward."

* * *

Pain. Pain unlike anything he'd ever experienced. Even the day it all began, and the gate taking his limbs from him. Even the first time he'd had his automail installed. It radiated through his whole body, blocking out all other sensation. Until he opened his eyes. And he could no longer feel the pain. 

Winry.

The room was blurry, and the light stung his eyes, but Edward knew that face anywhere. Impossibly deep blue eyes stared blankly across the room, and he blinked slowly a few times, to make sure he was awake. His mouth was dry, and his throat was sore, but he spoke nonetheless. "Hey...:" It came out a hoarse whisper, but it was enough.

Winry looked down at him, and as his vision slowly returned to normal, he noticed the tears that were streaming down her face. But after a second, she broke into a slow, shaky smile. "Hey..."

"Don't cry, Winry..." Again, a whisper. "I'm okay..."

She didn't reply as his eyes closed completely of their own accord.

* * *

Al stood shakily, leaning heavily on the cane Granny had lent to him to maintain his balance. He'd heard more than his fair share of raving and screaming and crying in the past few days, but each time he was able to shrug off all the criticisms that were levelled at him. He'd lost his legs. So what? According to the stories, Ed had lost one of his. Al could deal with it if his brother had. 

Of course, his brother still woud have to deal with it. Or... His sister? He shook his head. _That_ was one conversation he was not looking forward to. During the past few days, he had read and re-read his notes, and recalculated his calculations, and even returned to the ruined array to find the cause of such a blatant error in the transmutation, but there was nothing. No explaination for why what should have been a flawless reaction had gone so very wrong.

Was he being punished? Did it have something to do with equivelant exchange? His legs, and his brother's limbs hadn't been enough?

He knew it would be his downfall, but he was resolved to the fact. He would find a way to return his brother to his body. He would work tirelessly. Endlessly, if need be. He would-

"Mister Al?"

The youngest Elric looked up from the point on the floor he'd been staring at, and forced a smile. "Morning, Kain. What's up?"

Rose's little boy smiled quizzically. "Why do you have metal legs now?"

Al smiled as the boy came into the room, and tried to tap on his new automail. "I had a little accident, Kain."

"Was it acle... Amel... Alsemy?"

Al nodded. "Yes, it was Alchemy." He ruffled the boy's short brown hair. "And what did I teach you about Alchemy?"

The boy's eyes brightened as he answered. "Oh! Umm... It's... Uh... Dangerous to do it wiffout you to help me... And... It's all about exmivelant ekchange!"

Al laughed. "That's right." He replied, tapping his steel feet with the cane. "And this is why you have to be very careful with it. Do you understand?" Kain nodded happily.

"Kain!"

"Uh oh..." The boy whimpered, hiding behind Al's legs as his mother stepped in the room.

"I thought I told you to leave the patients alone, young man." Rose said sternly, but there was no trace of anger in her words.

"But! But it's Mister Al!" The boy exclaimed defensively. "And... And... I was just saying hullo!"

The teen had to bite his lip to keep from laughing. "It's fine, Rose." He said finally, placing a hand on the boy's head. "I needed the company."

Rose hid her smile, nodding. "Well, okay then." She knelt down, and her son immediately rushed into her arms. "But only because it's Alphonse." She gave him a gentle squeeze before kissing him on the forehead. "Now go wash up for lunch, okay?" He nodded and sped out of the room, and Rose allowed herself a small laugh before turning back to Al, her expression growing serious. "She's waking up."

Alphonse nodded, sighing. "Did the automail take?"

Rose nodded. "Yes, but there was a problem with the arm. They ran out of parts before it was completed, and Miss Pinako had to go to Rush Valley to get replacements, so she's going to be without an arm for a week or two." Al's gaze dropped back to the floor. "She's been asking for you, you know."

Al nodded. "How long?"

"A few hours." She replied. "She's been looking in the mirror and asking for you the whole time."

Al nodded sullenly, continuing to stare at the floor in silence. He felt her hand on his shoulder a second later, and looked up into a small smile. "Don't worry. I'm sure she'll forgive you." Rose reassured him, giving him the same kiss on his forehead as she had her own son. "Now go to her."

* * *

Rose watched the young man as he stood up to leave. He'd grown so very much from the eleven year old they'd rescued from the hidden city under Central. Gone was the short, slightly naieve boy, replaced with a much more solemn young adult. Alphonse had grown in leaps and bounds, passing six feet in height by the time he was fifteen, where his brother had barely passed five. He wore his hair short, and was deeply tanned from too much time out in the sun. But that was understandable. He had spent nearly five full years on the road, constantly on the move, searching eternally for more information, more data for his work. Work that he would tell nobody about.

Her eyes drifted to the silver chain that dangled out of his right pants pocket. She doubted even his superiors knew about it. Winry had tried to get the millitary to bring him home, and was surprised to find out that he had a tendancy to go missing for months at a time, only to be spotted in the Central library late one night, and be gone by morning. Even his yearly assessments were delivered by mail.

And when he had finally returned to Central, just over a year ago, everyone who knew him was startled by how he had changed. He no longer wore the bright smile that he'd become known for in the year he'd been around between his revival and the beginning of his wanderings. He no longer called anyone by their names, despite being asked to. He was completely withdrawn from society, seldom going out in public unless it was to eat in the mess hall, visit the library, exercise, or, on the rare occasion that he was spotted there, simply to sit alone in a park, and stare at the stars.

Until it was reported up through the chain of command by a young private who lived in the dormitory next door to Al's that there was a strong smell of alchohol coming from the man's room. Millitary police were sent to investigate the breach of standing orders, and they were stunned by what they found. Al's entire dorm was a complete mess. The furniture was all pushed into one corner, and the floor was littered with dozens of various alchohol bottles, all empty. But it was the walls that had surprised them the most. Every inch of the walls and ceiling were covered in extraordinarily complex alchemical forlulas, diagrams and charts and calculations written in miniscule handwriting around rough sketches of literally dozens of different transmutation circles.

There had been no charges laid against the young Major, but he was ordered to attend rehabillitation meetings for suspected alchohol addiction, and he was placed under a 24-hour watch for safety reasons. The millitary had recognised the potential risk an alchoholic Alchemist could represent, and made the decision to limit his movements. But it hadn't really mattered. The day he was to attend his first meeting, he had left his room with a smile on his face, in full uniform, and headed straight to the head of the department of State Alchemy, and actually apologised for what he had done. It was as if the twelve-year old Al had risen from the grave. He started calling people by name again, rather than by rank. He applied for a month-long leave pass, and it was granted almost immediately. Six years of backlog had given him a huge entitlement of leave, after all, and his achievements in the field of Alchemy were nothing short of revolutionary on a yearly basis.

And now that he had finally completed his mission, apparently, he was back fully to his old self, laughing and enjoying the company of all those around him. And Rose couldn't have been happier. He had showed up at the Rockbell's just over two weeks ago, shocking the entire household with his appearance. They hadn't seen him in years, and he'd specifically avoided Winry when she had gone to Central during what he called his "bad phase". He'd been a joy to be around, but he did have a tendancy to dissappear for hours at a time, only to return sweating and tired, claiming exercise and needing a hot shower. Only now did Rose realize what he'd been doing, and she'd already scolded him for it. But the appearance of the young blonde woman, who she'd been astonished to find out was Edward, he'd been on cloud nine. And she was happy for him. She had nothing but smiles for him as he stood and left the room.

* * *

She was standing alone by the window when he opened the door, her hair done up in a tight braid that hung down past her hips and dressed in a simple shite cotton robe. Al instinctively glanced down at her bare feet, flinching at the sight of the automail that replaced her missing left leg. She didn't even look back at him. "Hello, Alphonse." Al's eyes widened in shock. Her voice sounded almost exactly like their mother's had.

"Ed... I don't-" He began, but was cut off by a small huff.

"Ed... The name hardly fits anymore..." There was no hint of emotion in her voice.

"I... I tried!" Al managed to stammer, looking away in shame. "The calculations were perfect, and the array was flawless, and I triple-checked everything, and put years of effort into-"

He was silenced by a slender finger on his lips. Ed had crossed the distance silently, and looked up at her brother's face, small tears forming in her eyes. She took her hand away and wrapped her arm around his chest in a feeble hug, burying her face in his shirt. "Thank you..." She whispered. "For bringing me home..."

Al wasn't quite sure how to react, but he returned the embrace nonetheless. "Thank you for saving me." He replied, and smiled slightly when she let out a small laugh.

"Looks like we're together again at last..." She said when they finally broke apart. "Minus a few limbs, but I guess that's our equivalent exchange..." She looked down at her hand, sighing. "This will take some getting used to, though..."

Al took her hand, and looked her in the eyes. "Ed, I swear to you. I won't rest until-"

"No." She interrupted him, shaking her head. "You will. You'll forget the whole idea, in fact."

Alphonse was dumbstruck. "But your body! A-and-"

"No." She repeated. "This is the price we paid." Al looked away, and her hand left his, turning his face back forcibly. "You know the creedo. Nothing can be gained without something being lost in return." She sighed, turning and walking back to the recovery bed, where she sat down. "If being male is what I had to give up to come home, then I can learn to live with that." The tears were threatening to return as she continued. "Because you're finally out of that armour. We're together again, in the flesh, and that's all that matters."

She wobbled a little in her seated position, and Al rushed to hold her up. "Are you alright?"

She nodded. "Just a little headache... I guess this is a little much to take in all at once..."

Al nodded, gently helping her to lay back in the bed and pulling the blanket up over her. "Get some rest, sis..." He stopped in mid word, mortified at the slip.

She smiled weakly. "Say it. I said I have to get used to it, remember?"

He nodded again. "Sleep well... Sister."

* * *

A/N: Okay, as usual, R&R, and tell me what you think. Honestly, I'm not sure where my muse is taking me, but I'm quite willing to go there, regardless of the result. Stay frosty, and happy new year, all. -E. Red 


	3. Through the Experience

**Chapter 2: Through the Experience**

It was only slightly less painful to wake up in a strange body the second time. Ed rolled over in the recovery bed, flinching as he caught a glimpse of his new face in the vanity mirror in the corner. The resemblance to his mother that he now bore was something that he would have to deal with in time, but it caused him no small amount of torment in those first few days.He sat up slowly, letting the sheets pool around him, absently brushing stray hairs out of his face. At first, he just sat there for a few moments, simply breathing and readjusting to the way his new body felt. His new center of gravity had only thrown him off for a few hours the last time he'd gotten up, even with the new automail leg.

Which brought him back into the present. He could smell the fresh mechanics of the leg, oily and metallic, which, combined with a week-long period of being unconscious in a hospital bed, left him smelling like a factory worker after a full day's work on the production line. Which meant he needed a shower. For the first time in his new body. He looked down at himself, idly poking at his breasts, before sighing. "I guess there's nothing for it..." He muttered in defeat.

Still, it felt good to stand under the hot water and just let it seep into his skin. He was by no means a stupid person, after all, so he had at least some idea of what he had to do to maintain his new body. He managed to figure out exactly what he needed to do to get... Everything... clean, and had to admit that it felt extremely refreshing to be clean after so long, even after he'd rubbed the skin on his leg raw. "Right. Pat, don't rub..." He muttered sheepishly, and finished up before throwing a fresh robe on and returning to his room.

There were fresh clothes waiting for him on the bed when he got back to his room. "Winry..." The blonde mechanic had avoided him completely, and it hurt. He knew she must be going through the same feelings, and he guessed more. He had suspected for quite a while, long before the final battle with Dante, that the girl from down the hill had romantic feelings for him, and it just made the circumstances of his return all the more painful. What might have been, he would never know, nor would she. But, throughout his life, Ed had always seen Winry as a sister, and his life had always kept him from exploring anything further. So his loss was not as great as hers, but even as the thought crossed his mind for the -enth time, he heard his mother's final request echo through his thoughts.

_Try to find happiness this time..._

He sighed, separating the pile of clothes. He blinked once in disbelief at what he found underneath them, smiling at the gesture and moving the object to the bedside table. He turned back to the clothes, pulling on the briefs and shorts that had been supplied, but he faltered, picking up something that made him blush. Two seconds later, and he was at the door. "ROSE?"

The woman in question poked her head out of a door, just down the hall. "What is it?" She asked, as Ed beckoned her into the room. He closed the door behind her, still blushing, and only flushed deeper when Rose raised a quizzical eyebrow at him.

"I... Uh..." For one so famous for being quick-witted and sharp-tongued, Ed's words failed him at that moment, so he simply held out the article that had caused the scene. "Help me with this?" He asked in a small voice, using all his willpower to keep from yelling when Rose let out a small giggle.

When he finally got the thing on right, and Rose was satisfied the he was both thoroughly humiliated and knew how to do it from now on (even with only one arm), Ed was forced to admit that the bra really did make a difference. It was a little tight, as he was slightly larger in the chest than Winry (which set Rose off into another fit of giggles), but it did support the weight much better than just a robe had. He was just about to thank Rose for the help, and put on the shirt, when the door suddenly opened.

"Ed, I-" Alphonse froze in the doorway and his eyes went as wide as dinner plates, the blood draining from is face.

Ed stared back at him quizzically. "Yes?"

His brother made some incoherent noises, that sounded halfway between a stammer, a gurgle, and an apology, before retreating, slamming the door behind him.

Ed blinked a few times, but shrugged it off. "I wonder what that was about..."

Rose was in stitches, laughing so hard that she nearly tripped and fell to the floor. And Ed's completely innocent question that followed, as he pulled the shirt over his head, didn't help the situation any.

"What's so funny?"

He was completely mortified when Rose replied "You'll need to learn some feminine modesty, I guess." He'd forgotten about his gender change, and he felt his cheeks start to burn in embarrassment. Rose only smiled at this, and quietly commented that it wasn't a big deal. "You'll learn about all of this in time." She said softly, clicking the door lock shut. "All you need is a little guidance."

And guidance is what he got. Rose schooled him in the basics of feminine life thoroughly, everything from why the buttons on his shirt ("Blouse." She gently corrected him.) were on the wrong side, to the best way to take care of his hair ("I did have long hair when I was... You know..." He'd complained.), to the proper way the keep his body clean (which had him alternating from blushing crimson to white-faced for much of the afternoon.), to the proper way to sit in a chair ("Legs together, Edward."). He had just commented on the overuse of the word 'proper' when she finally broached the topic of menstruation on him. But it proved to be too much. He couldn't handle the finality of the concept, and was in tears before she even finished her first sentence. It took the better part of an hour for her to get him calmed down, and he apologized almost as soon as he had.

"I don't know what's gotten into me..." He admitted in a whisper. "I was never this emotional... Before."

Rose shook her head and hugged him again. "It's part of being female, Ed. The hormones play hell with your emotions on a near-constant basis." She heard him sigh in frustration as she continued. "And you need to let them out from time to time. It's not healthy to keep all that bottled up inside..."

There came a small knock from the door, and a small voice called in through the crack at the bottom. "Momma? Can I come in?"

Ed nodded at her questioning glance, and she stood and unlocked the door. A small boy poked his head into the room shyly, brown eyes peeking out from long black bangs that almost covered them. "Can I come in, lady?" He asked again, this time directing the question to Ed, who had to fight not to flinch.

"Sure." He replied, forcing a smile.

The boy entered the room slowly, looking at the ground instead of making eye contact. His mother smiled as she guided him to the bedside and gently reminded him to introduce himself. "H'lo, miss." He said quietly after a moment. "M'names Kain."

Ed would have laughed at the kid's shyness, but he wasn't quite confident in himself either, at the moment, so he settled for another forced smile. "Nice to meet you, Kain. My name's Ed. I'm Al's... Sister." He was glad he caught himself in time, and saw the boy's eyes light up.

"You're the Fullmetal Alsemist!" He said, shocked. Then he frowned. "But I thought you were a boy."

Ed shook his head, fighting the lump that suddenly appeared in his throat. "I used to be. I had a little accident with a transmutation. With Alchemy." He clarified, seeing the boy's confusion.

"Oh... Like Mister Al's metal legs?" The boy asked, and Ed nodded. "That's cool..." He looked at the ground again, and Ed could see the blush he was trying to hide. "You're really pretty, Miss Ed." He said shyly, and Ed felt himself blush to match.

"Th-thank you, Kain." He managed to stammer, looking up at the boy's mother, who nodded in agreement. "That's very nice of you to say..."

"Go play now, Kain." Rose said, ushering the boy out of the room. "Miss Ed needs her rest."

"Okay..." He sulked, grabbing the door handle. "But... Can I come visit again?"

Rose knew what he wanted, and she sighed. "Kain..."

"Sure."

Rose turned, her expression inquiring. "But not 'till tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay, Miss Ed. G'night!"

"Goodnight, Kain." He replied, and watched the boy scurry from the room. "I could use the distraction, Rose. I do have one question, though. Alsemy?"

Rose sighed. "He has trouble learning words." She admitted. "The other kids in the village tease him about it, but it's not his fault. It's just a silly speech impediment..." She sounded like she was close to tears.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"

"No, no. It's alright... You didn't know..." She stood, straightening her skirt. "He's a good boy, despite all the teasing. Wouldn't hurt a fly if it bit him..."

"You did good, Rose. I can tell."

"Thank you for saying so, Ed." She blushed. "I'll come get you for dinner, alright?" He nodded, and she left him alone with his thoughts. Or, really, one particular thought.

_You're really pretty, Miss Ed...

* * *

_

Dinner was a rich stew and fresh bread, which drove Ed completely mad from the smell. It was a delicious meal, and afterward, Ed stayed behind and helped put away the dishes as best he could. He'd pinned up the empty right sleeve to his shoulder, keeping it out of the way for convenience, and was glad the automail socket had already been installed when he accidentally stabbed straight through the fabric and hit metal. Winry hadn't been at dinner, but there was little anyone could do about it until she came to grips with her feelings. But the peaceful scene came to an abrupt stop when somebody pounded loudly on the front door. Ed put the plate he was holding back on the counter. "I'll get it."

He opened the door and poked his head out. And gasped.

It was Maria Ross. Ed was stunned into silence by the sight of the stoic officer, who now wore the epaulets of a Captain. Her partner, Sergeant Denny Brosh, was pacing back and forth behind her, flanked by four other army noncommissioned personnel. Who were fully armed for combat. "C-can I help you?" He managed to stammer out, avoiding eye contact.

"Ma'am. We're looking for the Stonewall Alchemist, also known as Alphonse Elric. Is he here?" Ross spoke in a calm monotone, but Ed recognized an underlying panic that lined her voice. One he'd only heard once, back when he had still been a he.

"To what point and purpose, Captain?" He asked, asserting his control over his emotions.

Ross looked a little startled that Ed had read her rank correctly, but she replied in the same monotone. "The military is looking for him, miss..." She trailed off expectantly, and Ed spoke before he could stop himself.

"Elric."

Sergeant Brosh nearly tripped. "_Who now?_" He asked, shaking his head.

"Captain Ross? Sergeant Brosh? What's all this about?" Alphonse appeared at the door behind Ed, and immediately all four rifles pointed up at him.

"Stonewall Alchemist Alphonse Elric." Ross said officiously, quickly recovering from the shock. "You are under arrest on the charge of research into, and the suspected performance of, human transmutation. By order of the Fuhrer himself you are hereby stripped of your rank and certification pending a full investigation, and all the rights and privelages of said appointments."

Ed felt his jaw drop, and he turned to his brother for an explanation as to how they could have known, but the man he saw was not the Al that he knew. His face had gone completely slack, betraying no emotion with his features, and he responded to the Captain's words with nothing more than a cold stare.

"You are to turn over your watch and we will escort you back to Central, where you will be detained for questioning and await your trial." Ross finished, her own eyes shifting into an equally cold stare.

"C'mon, Al..." Brosh pleaded. "Don't make this any harder than it is..."

Alphonse glared for another moment before nodding once, fishing the watch out of his pocket and tossing it to Ross. She caught it wordlessly, placing it in her pocket and nodding resolutely. "You have one minute to gather anything that you require to travel, as well as any notes you have made for any Alchemical purposes. Try to escape," Her eyes narrowed slightly, "And you will be shot."

Alphonse glared for an instant more, before turning and stalking into the house, leaving Ed to stand alone at the front door, dumbstruck. He turned and rushed back into the house, following Al to his room. "How did they know?"

"Long story." Alphonse grunted noncommittally, throwing his clothes into a small suitcase and snapping it shut.

"What are you going to do?"

"Don't know."

"Why aren't you talking to me?!"

Alphonse sighed. "You don't need to know, Ed. This is my equivalent exchange for getting you back. That's all I'll say." And that was, indeed, all he said before grabbing his cane and walking out of the room, leaving Ed confused, upset, and alone. But Ed wouldn't remain there for long.

He came back down the stairs a moment later, pulling on the blue coat that had been left out for him, the object that someone had stashed under his clothes hidden in one of it's pockets. Rose was there at the front door, a small money purse and a pair of boots in her hands. "Go after him, Ed. I'll take care of things here." Ed didn't even pause to think, pulling on the boots and throwing the purse into one of his pockets with a murmur of thanks.

He caught up with the blue uniformed group just before they got to the train station. "Al!"

Seven heads turned, and four rifles with them. "What are you doing?" Alphonse asked emotionlessly.

"I'm coming with-"

"No." Alphonse cut him off. "Go home, and wait for your arm. You aren't ready for this."

Ed's ego took the hit full force, but he shook his head. "Too bad. I'll suffer through it."

Ross stepped forward. "Ma'am, I'm going to have to ask you to leave. We can't-"

Ed only felt a little bad for punching her in the face. It wasn't a bad left hook, either.

"_Now _can I come?" He asked sarcastically, flinching as one of the soldiers ran forward and grabbed her arm. "I _did _just assault an officer, after all." The group stood in silence as Ross stood back up, spitting a little blood on the floor and glaring murderously at Ed.

"You want to be arrested so badly, lady, then fine. You got your wish." She almost growled. "Who the hell are you, anyway?"

Ed only smiled, pulling the object out of his pocket and throwing it to the ground at her feet. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

It was his State pocket watch.

* * *

A/n: Hey, all. No reviews yet (boo hoo) but that's fine with me. I'm going to get this idea aout of my head even if it kills my reputation. Reviews help, but honestly, I just hope someone actually is reading this, and that all those hits aren't just me. Later days. -E. Red 


	4. Towards the Truth

**Chapter 3: Towards the Truth**

Three days on a train in total silence. They had Ed and Al in seperate cars, and they had those two cars to themselves. They were fed whenever the train stopped, but other than that, their guards generally ignored them. Ed was half tempted to scratch out a transmutation circle on the seat beside him, just to get a reaction out of the four Privates that shered his car. But one if them noticed him watching them, and after that, one of them was always watching him. Ross and Brosh stayed in the other car, and the few times he had been able to get close to the partition between cars, he was sure he could hear someone cursing, and someone else yelling, but there was never enough time to distinguish the voices before his escort ushered him back to his seat.

Three long, boring days, with little to do but think, and sleep. And he just couldn't seem to sleep...

Central. Al was right, he wasn't ready. He wasn't prepared to face them all. His friends. His colleagues. Mustang, and his crew. Gracia Hughes...

Tears. _Ugh... Hormones..._ Ed sighed, wiping his eyes and looking back out the window.

"Err, Miss?" He looked back at the young man, who was just starting his watch shift. "Are you alright?"

This was the first time any of them had directly spoken to him, and it surprised him a little. He nodded after considering for a minute, and looked back out the window. But he wasn't about to give up on the prospect of a conversation to break the monotony. "What's your name, Private?"

He slid into the seat opposite Ed's, looking a little nervous. "Panchenko, Ma'am."

"And how long ago did you enlist, Panchenko?"

The man coughed slightly. "O-only about three months..."

"Fresh out of basic, then." He nodded, and Ed smiled. "Your laces are on the wrong side."

"What?"

Ed pointed at his boots. "You crossed the laces on the outside, not the inside."

Panchenko looked stunned. "How did you...?"

"I served a term with the millitary." Ed replied, once again looking out at the rolling ladscape as it flickered past. "I only wore my uniform twice, but I got the whole lecture. Both times."

"Twice?" He asked, scratching at his close-cropped brown hair. "How did you get away with that?"

"Politics." Ed answered evasively. If he couldn't put together the watch with the job, then that was his fault.

"I see..." There was a long period of silence, and Ed really didn't much care. The trip would be over soon, and he ws just going to have to deal with the pain as it came. He'd done it before, he could do it again, crazy hormones or no. He was startled out of his internal monologue by a small handkerchief appearing in his field of vision. He hadn't even realized he'd been crying. "Ma'am?"

"Thank you." He managed, idly wiping his eyes.

"We're almost to Central." The man said quietly. "Are you going to be alright?" Ed nodded, and he saw the Private relax a little. "I would like to ask you, though... Why did you attack the Captain?"

Ed sighed again, fiddling with the handkerchief. "People do strange things where family is involved."

Panchenko frowned. Obviously, the facts he had weren't adding up, and Ed allowed himself a small amount of enjoyment watching how easily he stayed anonymous. "Who are you? Really, I mean."

"I told you already." He replied, laughing. "Miss Elric will do."

"Not Missus?"

The heat flashed into his cheeks immediately. "NO!" He yelled indignantly. "WHAT KIND OF STUPID QUESTION IS THAT?! DOES IT LOOK LIKE I'M MARRIED TO YOU?!" He roared, holding up his left hand and waving it agrily in front of the stunned infanteer.

The rookie Private swallowed nervously. "Err. No... Ma'am."

It took a few deep breaths to regain his composure. "That will be all, Private."

"Yes, Ma'am." Ed almost laughed as the man nearly threw up a salute before stalking off back to his fellow noncoms, who were snickering loudly.

_Only a bit longer..._ Ed laid back on the bench seat, trying to get comfortable. _Then this whole thing will be over...

* * *

_

It was a normal morning at Central Headquarters. The mess hall was crammed chock full of gossiping enlistees, from new Privates to old Officers. But there were a few things that set today apart from the norm. The first being, for the first time in months, Lieutenant-Colonel Riza Hawkeye had left her desk. It had caused an immediate and noticeable sensation in the ranks. Hawkeye had hardened over the years since the Revolution, seldom speaking to anyone outside of her required duties, and almost never leaving the office or her dormitory. She'd seen well over a dozen of the best recruits pass through her office, the longest one lasting just over a month before collapsing on the job due to an overabundant workload. But Hawkeye's crew handled the work without complaint, the five of them toiling through with only each other to distract themselves.

Outside the office, however, the five were the best of friends. And two of them were much more. Seven years had changed what used to be jokingly called 'Mustang's boys'. Captain Jean Havoc had given up smoking, trading his cigarrettes for a sidearm, which he practiced with almost every day. Some said he was trying to get his wayward commanding officer out of her office by offering her a challenge, but she never seemed to notice. He'd even given up his skirt-chasing, leaving behind a legacy of failure with the opposite sex that had yet to be repeated.

Second Lieutenant Heymans Breda became one of the most reknowned tacticians in the millitary, at least in training exercises, by continually leading the opposing force detail to victory over the training force. It was said that life was just a huge game to the Lt., and that every piece of every puzzle was worked out beforehand whenever the Breda was involved. He spent many a day off frequenting one of several game parlours in Central, laughing and joking with old war veterans and civillians alike over a game of chess.

Chief Warrant Officer Vato Falman had changed the least out of the group, maintaining his ever-present formality and stoic expression whenever he was on duty. But there would always come a rare time, sometimes months apart, sometimes hours, where something would make him crack a smile. Nobody knew what these instances were triggered by, but they usually involved something breaking, or a heated argument between officers. But, as the ranking noncomissioned officer on duty, whenever the CWO was on duty, everything was in it's right place, regardless of how long it took.

Warrant Officer Kain Fuery was actually responsible for the fifth member of Hawkeye's crew, and the event that led to the appointment was the only recognised time in the last seven years that had cracked the icy woman's heart, and actually made her smile. In the fifth summer after the Revolution, WO Kain Fuery proposed and was married to Corporal Sheska Maranis, after a four-year courtship. The pair were inseperable, in public, at work, and in private. They were about he only source of warmth that anyone who had to visit the office felt, and they were possibly the happiest pair of millitary personnell that were currently enlisted.

So seeing Hawkeye out of her office was shocking enough. But it was the second piece of gossip that really got the rumor mill going.

Hawkeye set her tray down at the table next to her staff, sitting down behind it and slowly starting to pick at her runny eggs. The table had fallen silent, shocked by her appearance, and she looked up at them with a single quirked eyebrow. "As you were." She said simply before returning to her meal. That didn't last, though.

"Did you hear, Ma'am?" Sheska asked in a hushed voice. "They detained Alphonse on charges of Human Transmutation."

Hawkeye's fork hit the plate with a clatter, and her breakfast was forgotten. "What?"

"That was our reaction, too." Breda said around a mouthful of toast, earning himself a glare from Falman.

"What the Lieutenant means, Ma'am, is that we were as surprised as you." Falman reiterated.

"You don't think he was trying to... You know..." Sheska trailed off, and her husband put a reassuring arm around her shoulder.

"If he's been detained, that means he's alive." Kain said gently. "So we can ask him ourselves."

"If he isn't executed." Breda muttered, earning a glare and a smack from Havoc, who had remained silent until then.

"They wouldn't execute Al, you idiot." He said, frowning at his friend. "Why would you even-"

"You mean he's here?" A voice from a nearby table interrupted Havoc, and the group fell silent, listening in.

"Keep your voice down!" Another voice whispered. "But yeah, he's here. They're on their way from the train station right now."

"Damn. That's harsh. Didn't take them long, did it?"

"Guess not. But here's the kicker..."

"There's more?"

"Shut up and I'll tell you! Damn, man... So anyway, they picked him up, right? And then this one-armed chick just runs in outta nowhere and -POW!- knocks out Captain Ross with one punch!"

Hawkeye blinked in astonishment as she continued to listen. "No shit? Damn. That's not good for her..."

"Nope. Took two guys to hold her back. And it gets better. When they ask her who she is, she tells them to call her 'Miss Elric', and throws a State Alchemist's watch at them."

"No way... What was the service number?"

"Fullmetal's."

Hawkeye was standing before she knew it, and the orders spilled out of her without thought. "Havoc, pull Al's files. I want everything you can get. Breda, Falman, I need you to find Edward's. We're going to get to the bottom of this. Warrant, Corporal. You're with me." And she turned on her heel and strode out of the mess, her staff scrambling to comply.

It took less than a minute for a new spray of rumors to circle the room and make it back to the table where they had been, but had they been there, they would have heard the 'news'.

"Hawkeye's crew is on a warpath. They're going to break out the Stonewall Alchemist."

* * *

The car was nearly silent as Ed's escort drove down the streets of central. He stared out the window, content to simply smile as the memories flooded into his mind. The good ones made him smile, at least...

Another corner, another turn, and Ed started to remember the way to Central HQ. He had a few minutes at least. But when he clearedhis throat, all he could think to ask was something trivial. "Why did they name him Stonewall?"

Sergeant Brosh turned and stared at him quizzically. "You don't read the papers?"

He shook his head. "I've been... Away from society for a long time..."

Brosh squinted at him for a moment longer before nodding, apparently satisfied, and turning back towards the front window. "Alphonse performed exceedingly well in his examination. He answered every question during the written, and gave a heartfelt interview, or so I was told." The Sergeant was saring off into space, a small smile on his carefree face. "But he completely outclassed the entire group during the practical." He chuckled. "Waited for everyone else to go first. Watched them make their statues and balloons and even a few chimera. And then he clapped his hands and turned the entire parade square into a scale replica of the city, complete with moving figurines of people and cars." He glanced back at Ed's shocked expression. "The buildings in particular were very precisely crafted, and, as I said, he completely destroyed any chance his competitors had of passing. And so they named him."

Ed saw the man's grin, and couldn't help but mirror it. _Trust Al to show us all up like that..._

Central Headquarters hadn't changed at all since the last time he'd been there, Ed realized when the car fianlly pulled up to the large administration building. There did, however, seem to be a lot more drill practice going on at midday than he ever recalled seeing before. When he caught sight of more than a few heads following his escort across the plaza, he finally figured it out, and sighed heavily. The Central rumour mill was reputed to be the fastest in the country, and obviously the story about his 'attacking' Captain Ross had circled through it a few times already. He made eye contact with one of the nearer recruits, who didn't look away in time, and growled at him, just for fun. The poor kid actually dropped his rifle. Ed winced. If tradition still stood, that man would be buying his whole platoon a round later that night. And the base bar was none too cheap...

At least, not back then, it wasn't...

Ed noticed the group had stopped just in time to avoid running into Pte Panchenko's back.

"Ma'am." It was Al's voice, still devoid of emotion and utterly alien to Ed's ears. He was saluting smartly, standing perfectly at attention, and managing not to look tense or threatened at all, despite all the armed men whe were now watching him, and him alone.

He was saluting someone that he was surprised, and overall glad to see. Riza Hawkeye inspected him for a moment before nodding in acknowledgement of Al's formality, and returning the salute. Ed watced her face as she turned to speak with Ross, noticing a worry line here, and a dimple there. Make no mistake, Riza was just as beautiful and strong a woman as Ed remembered her to be, but he could see... No. He could _feel_ that something was off about her. But none of it showed as she spoke. "Captain. I appreciate you returning my personnel to my custody in such a timely manner. I will, of course, be removing him from your custody now."

Ross nodded. "This much I had expected, Ma'am." She motioned to Al's guards, who placed his brother's effects on the ground and moved to flank Ed's guard. "This one, however, I will be taking to the MPs, and deal with on my own."

"No." Al's voice cut her off before she could say any more.

Ross bristled. "I should remind you, _Alphonse,_ that you no longer have any right to speak in such a commanding tone to any millitary personnel-"

**Clap.**

Ed heard it. Ross heard it. Hawkeye heard it. Hell, half the parade square heard it.

Six weapons were cocked as soon as the sound registered. Alphonse faced down the armed section in front of him, his hands pressed firmly together, his cane forgotten at his feet. His eyes burned with a cold fury that nobody had ever seen before. "She will come with me." Alphonse snarled, and Ed felt himself flinch involuntarily. "Or I don't come at all."

Several tense seconds ticked by in silence, one alchemist staring unflinchingly down at a section's worth of weaponry. It was a scene straight ou of the storybooks his mother used to be so fond of. Ed's heart gave a little twinge at the thought, and he visibly shivered. "Alphonse..." He finally said quietly. "Stop it."

His brother (who, he now realized was actually older than him) looked at him hard, and he shook his head unflinchingly.. Cool grey eyes begged him to reconsider, but he wouldn't. Alponse only nodded once, the motion barely noticeable in all the tension, but he did remove his hands and slowly bend down to pick up his cane. When he stood a second later, the fire was gone out of his expression, replaced once again with a steely, cold stare. He wobbled slightly on his feet, and Ed saw two of Hawkeye's staff rush forward to help him, and he was surprised to recognise Fuery and Sheska. The pair tried to help him stand, but he just shrugged them off and stepped up the stairs, leaving them to collect his effects.

Al paused at the head of the stairs, glanceing back with a question in his eyes that Ed had more than expected. "Go. I'll be fine."

There was stunned silence on the parade square. Ed would learn later on that Major Alphonse Elric was famous for doing exactly what he wanted, regardless of permission. The fact that he actually seemed to ask for it was mind-boggling, apparently. But that would come later. At the moment, Alphonse simply nodded and stalked off into the building. His apparent CO watched him go before turning back to Ed. "Who are you?" She asked in a mystified tone.

He didn't answer. not directly, anyway. "Riza Hawkeye... Congratulations on your promotion, Lieutenant Colonel. Last time I saw you, you were a simple captain, with a simple goal." Ed gave the woman a mock smile. "How is the old bastard, anyway? Got you into a miniskirt yet?"

If the 'audience' had been stunned before, it was nothing to now. Hawkeye's gaze erupted into a towering rage, but Edward could see the pain in her eyes, and he immediately felt sorry for what he said. "What did he do to you...?" He whispered to himself, but nobody caught it. They were too busy gawking at her.

"Take her to the brig." Was all the LtCnl said, watching as the armed escort quickly turned and ushered the offending woman away. She had to struggle hard not to simply execute the young woman right then and there. As soon as they were out of sight, she turned and frowned at all the inactive soldiers who were staring at her. "Back to work. ALL OF YOU."

They complied without hesitation.

* * *

Hawkeye was breathing hard, and everyone in her office knew that meant she was fighting tears. Whoever that strange blonde girl was, she had cut through the LtCnl like nothing. Alphonse was shown into her office without a comment from anyone, and the pair sat in silence as Riza collected herself enough to look him in the eye and say "Explain."

Alphonse looked at her critically. "If you know the charges, you know what I did."

"Yes, but a woman?" She snapped. "And you gave her Edward's watch? Did you fall in love with a dying woman during your travels, or-"

"She's not intentionally a woman, no."

Hawkeye blinked in confusion. It definitely wouldn't be a good day for her steely reputation. "What are you saying?"

Alphonse finally broke out of his angry shell, and smiled widely. "Brace yourself, Ma'am. This one might take a while."

* * *

Hawkeye's staff sat silently at their desks, not daring to move, hardly breathing, even. They waited for it. A shot. A slap. A yell. Anything. And when they finally got it, it wasn't quite what they expected.

**"SHE'S WHO?!?"**


	5. Approaching the World

**Chapter 4: Approaching the World**

"...And now Edward is..."

"Yes." Alphonse said blandly, maintaining eye contact with his direct superior. Hawkeye looked completely stunned.

"Permanently?"

"Presumably." Her surprise was understandable, though. It's not every day that the single most famous Alchemist in modern time returns from the dead in a body of the opposite gender.

"You're sure..."

"Yes, Ma'am." Although, he really wasn't when it came to his new sister. She certainly was going to cause a sensation when the word got out. Thankfully, they could speak in relative safety at least in her office. Her staff was very good at keeping prying ears away, and they would not repeat a single word of anything they might hear, out of loyalty.

Hawkeye looked down at the multitude of files that lay spread across her desk. One in particular lay open in front of her, and she looked hard at the header. _Report of Hostile Contact._ A standard sitrep sheet. But at the bottom, in large red letters, was what made this one stand out.

**Fullmetal Alchemist, Mjr. Elric, Edward- MIA**

"The paperwork alone will kill me." Riza groaned aloud, and looked up into a small, satisfied smirk. "Don't think you're off the hook, Stonewall." She said dryly. "You did commit a capital crime, after all."

A tiny twinkle appeared in his eye as he smiled back. "True, but there were no casualties. And, if I'm not mistaken, I've just solved one of the greatest mysteries the millitary is still investigating."

She sighed in disgust, knowing he was right. "You're suspended from active duty until this is cleared up, and you'll be taking a pay cut for the next year as a direct result of your actions. Understood?"

Al nodded as he stood up. "Perfectly. Ma'am." He gave a small salute as he turned to leave the office, but he paused at the door. ""I think it's worth it in the end, though. And I think you'll agree with me eventually."

Hawkeye hid her smile by looking back down at the files. "Out, Alphonse." And out he went. As the door clicked shut, she reached for the phone that was half obscured by a large photo of a suit of armour and a rather short man in a red coat. "This might not go over well..." After only one ring, a woman on the other line answered.

_"Fuhrer Mitchell's office. May I ask who is calling?"_

"This is Lieutenant-Colonel Hawkeye. I need arrange a meeting..."

* * *

"Miss Elric?" The Staff Sergeant's voice wode Ed from his nap, and he rolled over lazily to look the man in his deep green eyes. "Your presence has been... Requested." The lock clicked and the iron door creaked slightly as it swung open. "Would you please follow me, Ma'am?" 

"You woke me up." He replied flatly, shifting into a sitting position and pulling on his shoes. "Ever heard the phrase 'Best let sleeping dogs lie'?"

"Ma'am?"

He sighed in frustration. "Never mind. Obscure reference, I guess." He stretched like a cat as he stood up, Idly noting that the new automail sockets had finally settled down from a dull pain to a mild itch."Let's go."

The layout of HQ had obviously not changed much over the years, he noticed ashe allowed the large man to lead him around many different corners. They passed the mess hall and gymnasium, and through an office building, and even through a catwalk that overlooked the parade square. And by the end of it, Ed was sure he wanted to die. The eyes had been what had started it. Everybody they passed took the time to examine him, some discreetly, many much less so. Those were the bad ones. Edward felt like a piece of meat, being examined for freshness.

And then somebody whistled.

Ed felt his face flush involuntarily, and his he curled his fist inside the pocket of the slacks he'd been wearing that morning. It happened several times, wolf whistles and catcalls from small groups of soldiers the pair passed as they walked. And each time, Ed could do no more than duck his head and hide his shame. He knew that most women would be embarrassed, but a little proud of so much attention, but he hadn't quite reached that point yet. "Gods help me if I ever do..."

"Ma'am?"

He blinked, not realizing they'd stopped. "Oh."

It was the Fuhrer's office. Ed could see a secretary typing away out of the corner of his eye, and a brief, unbidden image of Sloth, the homonculus that had taken on the guise of his mother, flickered across his vision, and he stumbled in mid-step. The Staff Sergeant immediately caught him, gently steadying him until he pushed away. "Thank you..." It was barely a whisper, but the man nodded and stepped forward, knocking on the carved oak doors.

"Send her in." The voice that answered was completely unlike that of the previous Fuhrer. It sounded almost... Playful?

The same doors closed behind him as Ed stepped forward, and the office came into focus, looking exactly like it had the last time he'd been in it. Save, of course, for the man who sat behind the large desk. Dressed in a standard millitary uniform, the man was rather small, not much larger than Edward had been at fifteen. He had a mop of untidy red-blonde hair that fell well past regulation length, and large black eyes that shined with barely controlled mirth as they watched him approach. Looking back, Ed would eventually admit that Fuhrer Mitchell was rather attractive, but at the moment, his stomach gave a small flip as heat flowed into his cheeks again. The man grinned widely at that, and gestured him forward into a large, overly cushy chair.

"Please relax, miss." He said in a light, airy voice. "There's no cause for concern. I'm actually quite as astonished as you to be sitting here today."

_Relax... Yeah, right..._

"After all, it's not every day you meet the legendary 'People's Alchemist' in person."

Ed was stunned back onto his metaphorical heels. "H-how-?"

The Fuhrer laughed, and Ed's stomach gave another tiny flip. "If certain Majors are to be believed, you were once the Fullmetal Alchemist, Edward Elric." He leaned forward, curious. "Tell me: Am I going to have to order a psych exam on him, miss?"

It took a second for Ed's brain to overcome his internal acrobatics. "Alphonse... He just came out and told you?"

"Is that a yes?"

Ed frowned. The man's carefree attitude was already starting to get on his nerves, and they'd only been speaking for a few seconds. "No it isn't... Sir." He added the honoriffic as an afterthought. "You've been informed correctly. I was... And still am, Edward Elric." He gestured vaguely at himself. "Albeit slightly modified."

Mitchell burst out laughing (Again). "Slightly, you say? That's a bit of an understatement, lass." The man gave his head a small shake. "You seem a lot more comfortable about this than I would be."

Ed rolled his eyes. "Only on the outside, sir. But there's no sense complaining. What's done is done, and I'll move on."

The Fuhrer nodded in agreement. "That's a very wise way of looking at it." He paused for a second, frowning. "But surely you realize that 'Edward' is hardly a fitting name for a young lady."

Ed nodded slowly, looking anywhere but the man's face. "I suppose you're right, but... I'm not ready to let it go just yet..."

"Under the circumstances, I can accept that."

There was a moment of awkward silence, and Ed decided to voice the question that was burning in the back of his mind. "So... What happens now?"

The Fuhrer looked at him closely for a second, and the humour completely vanished from his gaze, replaced with a calm, calculating look that cut right into Ed's soul. But it was gone as quickly as it had come, and he smiled again. "Well, now that's entirely up to you. We would, of course, love to have you back as a State Alchemist-" Ed coughed, trying to cover the strangled laugh that had almost escaped him, and Mitchell quirked an eyebrow at him. "There've been a lot of changes to the system since... Well, since you actually. State Alchemists are completely autonomous now, only holding millitary rank as a symbol of status more than anything else." He gave a shrewd smile at that. "Of course, those who do take their comission usually end up with all the best projects and funding... But military life is not a priority for most Alchemists, and we've allowed them free reign to be who and what they want to be." He stood, looking straight into his eyes. "All because of you."

He began to pace a short circle as he continued. "Your new citizenship papers will be validated within a month's time, and you must decide what our official story will be. Where you were, what you were doing, what happened on that night, eight years ago." He stopped and looked at him again. "The ball is in your proverbial court, Elric."

"I... I don't know..."

The Fuhrer nodded. "Like I said, you have about a month to decide what-"

"Oh, no. _That_ I'm already decided on." Ed interrupted. "I've really got nowhere else to go. I can't go back to Rizembool for the rest of my life, and I won't be able to really settle down anyway, no matter where I am." He let his gaze wander around the room as he spoke, not really focusing on anything in particular. "The military is about the only way I can function at all and still feel a little usefull."

He looked back down into another quirked eyebrow. "And what shall we call you in the meantime?"

Ed smiled as he stood. "Call me Fullmetal, sir. I'll figure out the story eventually."

"I'm glad." The Fuhrer replied, holding out a hand. "We'll get you settled in and reinstated by tomorrow."

"I thought the paperwork was going to-"

"Take a month? Well, normally it would. Seems my rank can sometimes speed up the process." The man was grinning from ear to ear, and Ed couldn't help but laugh (though in hindsight, it was more of a giggle. His mind told him otherwise, in an attempt to cope.).

"Then we'll go from there?"

"I would have it no other way."

Ed shook his hand, noting that he'd offered his left one without comment. "I think I prefer you to the last Fuhrer I met."

Mitchell shuddered slightly, leading Ed back to the door. "After what I heard happened to that one, I don't really think I want to know any more about it." The Staff Sergeant opened the door as they approached, his awestruck expression telling Ed all he needed to know. The Fuhrer must have seen the look of utter fear that flashed across his face, because he looked back at the noncom with a small frown. "How long have you been standing there, Sergeant?"

The man visibly twitched. "I'm responsible for the lady when she is out of her cell, Sir."

Mitchell shook his head. "Well, now you're going to be responsible for whatever the good Major decides she needs you for."

"Sir?"

"Did I stutter, Corporal?" The mirth was gone from the Fuhrers face again, and the poor man went completely white.

"Sir! No Sir!" He said, snapping to attention to cover his shock.

"Good." Edward silently vowed not to get on this man's bad side as he turned back to his office. "Now, You need to take Major Elric to the quartermaster and assist in her kit issue process." He paused at the door and cast a glance over his shoulder. "Unless you have anything else to add?"

"Sir! No, Sir!"

"Excellent. You're dismissed, then." He waved them off over his shoulder, once again grinning at his own performance. Ed took a moment to compose his thoughts before he turned back to his newly appointed assistant.

"Do you have a name, Staff Sergeant?"

The man flinched again. "It's Corporal now, Ma'am." He said bleakly, his eyes downcast.

"I won't let your wife and kids take that hit, Sergeant." Ed almost laughed at the man's expression. "I saw the ring, and the bags under your eyes indicate a newborn."

He flushed and nodded. "That's right, Ma'am." He seemed to finally remember he was speaking to an officer, and his hand once again snapped up in a smart salute, fingertips brushing his close-cropped dark hair. "Staff Sergeant Avery Johnson, reporting as ordered, Major Elric!" He said officiously, and this time Ed did laugh (Again, others would have said 'Giggled').

"Stand easy, soldier, and let's go. All this standing around in one place is starting to make my leg itch."

* * *

It was hours before they finally got to the double dorm that Ed had been assigned with all of the issue kit that he'd signed for. Sergeant Johnson showed him how to use the lockboxes in the closets properly before she sent him home and began the arduous task of unpacking and labelling everything he'd been issued. He was about an hour into the task when the sound of a key in his door interrupted him. It swung open to reveal a young woman with a cartload of kit of her own. She had firey red curls that fell past her shoulders, and tiny grey eyes that examined Ed as she stepped into the room. 

"I suppose you're my roommate." Ed said slowly, folding up another undershirt and tucking it away into a drawer before stepping out into the small living area. A small glint of a silver chain caught his eye, and he felt himself smile. "Welcome, Major." He said, and the redhead blushed.

"Err... Hi." She pulled the small cart into the room and shut the door before offering her hand. "I'm Andrea. Err, Major Andrea Wallace, I suppose."

It was her right hand. Ed sighed internally. "Sorry, Major, but I'm a lefty. At least, until my automail mechanic gets back to me." To her credit, the woman only flinched a little, blushing in embarrassment as she switched hands.

"Sorry. I, uh... Didn't notice." She said shyly. "And, err, who are you?"

Ed faltered. There was only one name he could think of, and he dared not use it. "Major Elric. My given name is... Unimportant, for now."

She quirked an eyebrow. "Any relation to the famous Elrics?"

The question was innocent enough, but Ed merely retorted with a stiff "Yes.", and left it at that.

"Interesting..." She shoved the cart uncerimoniously into her private room and closed the door, speaking through the thin wall. "What was he really like?"

"Who?"

"Who do you think, silly?" She sounded a little mocking, but Ed brushed it off. "The People's Alchemist!"

"I... He..." It's a very awkward thing, being asked to describe yourself. "Well... He was..."

Her head poked out of her door. "Well? Spit it out, girl!"

"He was... Short." Ed flinched at the admission, something he would never have said in his old body, but held his comments to himself. "And... He was very loyal to his friends..."

"Huh..." Wallace grunted, slipping back into her room. Ed could see her opening a suitcase, pulling out numerous articles of clothing, all in various pastel colours. "How close is the relation?" She was prying, which was starting to make Ed mad, but there was no hint of anything malicious in her voice.

"Direct."

"What, like cousins?"

Ed shook his head. "It's a little abstract... And private."

The redhead visibly jerked, looking abashed. "Heh... Sorry... I never was much good at subtlety..."

Ed shrugged. "You'll learn."

"I suppose..." Another lull in the conversation occurred, leaving the pair in silence for a long time, slowly unpackaging, labelling and stowing their belongings until Wallace's stomach let out an almighty (and most un-feminine) gurgle. "Err... I guess I should go get something to eat..." She murmured to herself, hanging up the last of several (in Ed's opinion, at least) exceedingly frilly undergarments in her personal closet, and locking her trunk. She stopped short of the front door, however, and cast a glance over her shoulder. "Err... Are you coming as well, Major Elric?"

Ed considered this, idly noting that he hadn't eaten since before meeting with the Fuhrer. He'd long since finished his unpacking, and closed the small 'Dress and Deportment' handbook that had come with his uniforms. _Ugh... Why not._ "Sure. I could do with a hot meal..."

The walk to the mess hall was a quiet, uncomfortable one, though mercifully it was a short one. A brief wait in the line allowed for a small conversation about the quality of the food, and what to have, but again they fell silent when they reached an empty table. Ed could feel the eyes boring holes into his body, and suppressed a shiver. It finally occurred to him why exactly everyone was so interested, and it was really no surprise when he thought about it. He'd slugged an officer as a civillian, taken a three-day train ride into Central HQ, punctured through the defences of another, higher-ranked officer, been locked up for a few hours, gone directly into the Fuhrer's office, and come out a fully commissioned Major, and a State Alchemist to boot. And here he was, just sitting in the mess hall, eating his dinner like it was the most natural thing in the world. The pure absurdity of the situation got to him after a moment, and he couldn't stop himself. He started to chuckle (read: giggle), and erupted into a full-blown laugh when his new roommate asked him what was so funny.

"It's... Complicated..." Ed said through his tears of mirth.

"What're you laughing at, b- Sister?"

Al was smiling for the first time since they'd been 'detained' at the Rockbell's as he approached the table, an overflowing tray in hand. Ed saw Mustang's old crew sitting down at an empty table on the other side of the room, and noticed a few glances that they cast his way. "It's not important, Al." Ed replied as he sat down beside him. "Al, meet Major Andrea Wallace. Andrea, this is my brother-"

"Alphonse Elric..." She finished, her tone just a little short of awestruck. "Wow. I never really expected to meet _you_ in person, sir..."

Al flushed crimson and waved her off. "Please, just call me Al." He noticed Ed looking over his shoulder and followed his gaze back to the other table, where Havoc, Breda, Falman and the Feurys visibly flinched and turned back to their meals. "Are you alright, sister?" He asked, shaking his head slightly at his colleagues' behavior.

Ed swallowed hard to clear the lump that was forming in his throat. "Do they... Do all of them... _Know_?"

Al nodded. "I didn't tell them, but you know how they are..." Indeed, Havoc especially was known for his excellent hearing, and had been caught once or twice before eavesdropping on his CO's private meetings. The whole lot of them were generally harmless, though, and never went farther than winning a few bets with the information they gleaned where they weren't supposed to.

"How... How did they react?" Though he was, admittedly, afraid of the answer.

Al smiled reassuringly. "They're all worried about you. They couldn't believe it, at first, but I told them what happened, and they all expressed their concern, especially Sheska." Ed must have been tearing up again, because Al handed him a napkin and gave his arm a gentle squeeze. "I told them to leave ou alone until you're ready for them, so don't let yourself be pressed into anything just yet if you're not comfortable with it."

Ed shook his head, idly dabbng at his eyes. _Damn hormones..._ "No... I want to... I need to talk to them... It'll help me get used to... This." In his heart, he knew he wasn't ready to face them, but he tried to rationalize his decision by claiming to his doubt that the faster he got used to his new situation, thet better off he would be.

Andrea was staring across the table at her roommate, a curious look hidden behind a small smile. "What do you mean by 'this'?"

Ed sighed. It was just like his luck to get stuck with a roommate that liked to know things. "It's private, Wallace." He said cooly, though without any malice in the words. "Maybe I'll tell you later, but for now, it's better that you not know."

The redhead huffed indignantly. "Fine." She said scathingly, standing. "Maybe later, then." She spared them both a small nod before picking up her tray and stalking off into the crowd.

Al shook his head, chuckling slightly. "You may want to find a less inquisitive roommate, sister."

Ed looked down at his plate, the roast beef no longer looking at all appetizing, despite his hunger. He pushed the tray away dejectedly and put his head down on the table with another heavy sigh. This whole... _Existance_, was coming straight at him way too fast. "You were right, Al." He admitted quietly. "I should have stayed back home... I'm not ready to face all this yet..."

Al placed an arm around his shoulders and held him gently for a moment. "Don't worry about it. As long as we've got each other, we'll be fine. Besides," He added with a small grin. "No sense trying to change the past, right?"

Ed giggled (Yes, he was already starting to realize his laugh for what it really was...) at the utter hypocracy of the statement, given the pair's current situation. "No, I suppose not..." He stood up slowly, taking up his tray and depositing it in front of a nearby corporal who had, seconds earlier, complained about the size of the meal portions. Al did likewise, following Ed to the door, where he had stopped and glanced back at Hawkeye's staff, who were taking turns sneaking glances back at him.

"Do you want me to get them, sister?" Ed smiled internally at how easily Al had made the transition to calling him that.

"Let them eat. I can wait." He answered, pushing through the doors. Al paused for a second, looking pointedly at the group, who stared questioningly back. He flashed them five fingers and jerked his thumb out the door, and they nodded in understanding as Al turned and left after his sibling.

* * *

It didn't take them the five minutes Al had asked for before they were all on their way, somewhat hurriedly, back to their office. And when they swung open the door, there they were. Al stood on one side of the desk, and Ed sat atop it, ankles crossed and dangling well above the floor. His... Her hair was down, as it's rather difficult to braid with one hand, and he... She looked more scared than any of them had ever seen before. She loked up as the door opened, and her face went completely pale, but she forced a small smile. "Hey, guys..."

* * *

A/N: So here's another. Enjoy, and reviews are, as always, appreciated. Oh, and I think now is the point at which I should mention the following: 

**This is NOT going to be another RoyEd Fic.**

Personally, while I like the character, I just really cant stand to see another one, let alone have it come from me. There's only been one that I have liked, and it was mentioned at the base of the prologue.


	6. Around the Issue

**Chapter 5: Around the Issue**

"Ed...?"

The blond flinched at the uncertainty in Sheska's voice, but nodded. "Yeah..."

The five of them stood together a few feet away, and the looks on their faces were as varied as their personalities. Feury had his arm around Sheska's shoulders, and both looked completely disbelieving but, at the same time, a little awestruck. Breda was a little pale, and was staring straight into his eyes, while Havoc and Falman maintained completely passive expressions, though their eyes betrayed their distrust. Ed again bit back the painful feeling that rose into his throat and maintained his forced smile. He knew that this would be the reaction from pretty much everyone he knew, and he was prepared to deal with it each time, as needed.

_It still hurts, though..._

"How?" Havoc, oddly enough, was the one to break the ensuing silence.

Al tugged gently on the leg of his trousers, revealing the shiny gleam of his new automail. "Same way I got these."

"So the notes in your-"

"Yeah." Al interrupted, cutting Feury off in mid-sentence. "They were accurate." Ed shot a questioning look at him, and was shrugged off.

"Then... How??" Breda wasn't quite making the needed connection.

"It doesn't matter." Ed said finally, shaking his head at Al's depressed expression. "I'm here, alive and in the flesh, because of it. End of discussion."

Breda flinched back. "Yes, ma'... Err... Sir..."

Ed sighed, absently rubbing the bridge of his nose. "Ma 'am will do, Breda. The sooner I get used to it, the better off I'll be." Or so he thought.

Ed was spared an awkward game of twenty questions by the sudden opening of a door at the back of the room. Hawkeye stood in the doorway, her expression blank and officious. Ed hopped off the table and came to attention. "Atten-shun!" He barked, and everyone else straightened up as well.

Hawkeye only frowned. "As you were. Major Elric, a word in my office, if you would."

The siblings didn't bother looking for the cue. "Ma 'am?" They questioned in stereo, and her frown only deepened.

"No games, Fullmetal." She said curtly, turning and closing the door behind her. Ed felt his stomach tighten at her words. In all the time he'd known her, Riza Hawkeye had never called him by his title. Edward usually. By rank, even, though only on a few occasions. But to hear her address him like that...

_It hurt. Just like everyone else..._

A small nudge from his brother spurred him into action, crossing the room and entering the office at the far end, noting one last look of encouragement from Al as he closed the door behind himself. The office, he noticed immediately, had not changed in the least since the last time he'd been in it. The only visible difference was the officer who sat behind the desk, a cold, uncaring woman instead of a sly, calculating man. Hawkeye motioned him into the empty chair across from her, and waited for him to sit before speaking.

"Given the extraordinary circumstances, I'll forgo the usual formalities and get straight to my point." She intoned stiffly, her eyes never leaving his. She seemed to be looking for something in his gaze, though he had no idea what it could be. "What happened to you?"

Ed shook his head. "I died." He answered slowly. "Al sacrificed himself to bring me back, but I..."

Hawkeye nodded, understanding. As close as the pair were, Edward was the more... Impetuous of the two. He would never have settled for life without Al. So many questions were answered in her mind, but more were surfacing just as fast. She thought for a moment, and carefully selected her next query. "What comes next?"

Ed shivered. The thought was still causing him problems. In fact... "I... I don't... There's nothing left for me..." He heard his voice start to crack, and felt his eyes burn, but he couldn't hold it in. The tears started to fall anew, and he shook his head, trying to stop the reaction. But it wouldn't stop. He was faced again with the crushing reality of the situation yet again.

There was nothing left for him to do. His purpose had already been fulfilled. Al was alive again. He'd accepted his mother's death, and his own as well. But now, he lived again.

Without purpose.

He was shocked when he felt a strong, slender pair of hands gently take hold of his shoulders, snapping his head up to look into calm blue eyes. "I remember meeting a young man, long ago." She spoke softly, but there was still unmistakable firmness in her voice. "A man who believed that he was in complete control of his destiny. A man who refused to give up, where everyone else would have. Who gave freely of himself to any who asked, and who gave away more love than any single person I've ever known." She was still searching for something in his eyes, he noted idly, but she pressed on. "Do you think that because you are no longer a man that you can't still be that person?"

Ed flinched at the phrase 'no longer a man', but let it go with a sigh. "I don't know what to think..." He answered in a small voice, letting his gaze fall away from hers. "I'm lost and confused... A-and... And I don't know who to turn to..."

Hawkeye nodded sympathetically, letting go of his shoulders and leaning back on her desk. "Everybody looses the path at some point, Edward." He blinked at the use of his name, but let it pass. There would be better times to worry about such things, after all. "As for who to turn to... Well, that is completely up to you. My door, however, is always open if you need me."

Ed smiled a little at that. Who would've expected Hawkeye to offer her counsel for his personal problems?

"That being said, I've received orders from the Fuhrer himself that place you under my direct supervision, alongside your brother." A ghost of a smile flickered across her features as she continued. "I would assume that this is an attempt to help you both reintegrate with the military and to adjust to... Your current situation. Which means you will report here at oh-nine hundred every morning, in uniform, ready to work."

Ed forced himself to straighten up. "Understood, Ma'am." Distract him from the problem. It was an old trick, to be sure, but it was effective regardless.

She nodded in satisfaction. "Good. I suspect that this will not be the last time that we have this discussion, but for now, I think we should take our leave of it." She stood up and returned behind her desk. "There will be other times to deal with it when we're a bit more... Settled. You're dismissed, Major."

Edward stood and saluted awkwardly with his left hand. "Yes, Ma'am." He turned on his heel to leave, but paused with his hand on the doorknob. "Thank you." He said quietly over his shoulder, feeling a little better about the whole situation. Another phantom smile flickered on the Lieutenant Colonel's face, and she nodded in response before turning her gaze back to her work.

* * *

An uneventful week passed in the blink of an eye. Al was cleared by the Fuhrer himself and resumed active duties alongside his sister the following day. Hawkeye allowed them a brief reprieve to get settled in, but once they did, she assaulted them with mountains of paperwork. The distraction was exactly what Ed needed to get his mind off of his situation, but even with all that going on, he was still suffering through his problems on his own. He had no intention of heaping his woes on anyone else, and was fully prepared to carry on as he had before. Until someone else stuck their nose into the whole thing.

* * *

"Ma'am." Hawkeye looked up from her papers, taking in the sight of the woman at the door. The silver chain that dangled from her pocket glinted slightly, giving away her rank even before her epaulets did. The redhead blushed at the raised eyebrow Riza levelled at her. "I did knock..." She said nervously, fidgeting uncomfortably.

"Indeed... What are you here for, Major?" The woman was clearly one of the newest recruits, as she flinched away from the sound of her rank.

"Err... I was informed that you are the CO responsible for both Majors Elric, Ma'am..."

Riza placed her pen down and leaned back slightly in her chair. "I am."

"Well... It's about... Err..." The woman was clearly very uncomfortable with whatever she was there to say, and it irritated Hawkeye to see an officcer act in such a manner, but considering the subject, she forced herself to contain her ire to a small sigh.

"Have a seat, Major, and relax. I don't actually breathe fire, despite whatever rumours you've heard."

The woman did as directed, flushing darker as she did so. "O-of course not... But..."

"So what can I help you with, then?"

The woman swallowed nervously before speaking. "Well, I am Andrea Wallace, the Frost Alchemist, and... I share a dorm with Major Elric... Err, the female sibling, of course."

Hawkeye fought hard not to roll her eyes. "Of course. Is there some kind of problem between the two of you?"

The woman let slip with a slight nod before she caught herself. "Oh, no Ma'am. It's just..." She looked down into her lap, embarrassed. "Is she really _the _Fullmetal Alchemist, Ma'am?"

Riza couldn't stop her eyes this time. "Yes, Major, she is. And before you ask, she became female in an alchemic reaction that went horribly wrong."

"Oh..."

Hawkeye sighed again. "So I ask again, what is the problem, Major Wallace?"

Andrea straightened up a bit, forcing her cheeks to stop burning through sheer willpower. "It's not a problem, per se... I didn't want to have to file a complaint about it... But she's been keeping me up at night, Ma'am."

That was not something Hawkeye had expected to hear. "What?"

"I haven't been able to sleep very well... The walls in the dorms are so thin, and I haven't had time to alchemize a better sound barrier."

"What has she been doing, Major?" Riza interrupted, her concern evident in her voice.

Wallace squirmed slightly. "She... She cries, Ma'am. Every night, she cries herself to sleep, and I didn't want to write it into a report to go on her file..."

Hawkeye was stunned. "Every night?"

"Yes, Ma'am."

An uneasy silence settled over the pair of them for a brief moment as Hawkeye pondered how best to react to this. Glancing through the still open door of her office, she was silently glad to see the adjoining room was empty. Her staff must have gone to lunch early. _Thank gods for that..._

"Thank you for informing me, Major. Would you like to be reassigned to a new dorm?" The question was asked calmly, and the Frost Alchemist looked up in surprise.

"Oh, no... Not at all... I was just... Concerned about her, that's all..." Her gaze fell again and she shook her head sadly. "With all the rumors flying around, I wasn't sure what to do, so I came to you, Ma'am."

"I see..." Riza nodded. "Alright. I'll look into it. You're dismissed, Major."

"Aye, Ma'am." The redhead snapped a sharp salute after standing up and marched from the room, her burden lifted from her shoulders for the time being. Behind her was left one very concerned Lieutenant Colonel, mulling the information around in her head. _Rumors... About Ed?_

The ringing of her phone brought her out of her thoughts, and she coughed once to clear her throat before answering. "Hawkeye."

_"Riza? Are you allright? You sound... Upset."_

A small smile touched her lips. "No, I'm fine. You couldn't have picked a better time to call, actually..."

* * *

It was stupid, and he knew it. But every night, his thoughts would follow the same downward spiral through the same thoughts, and he had no idea how to stop them. It would start out innocently enough, with a simple review of his day as he lay back in his bed. Eventually, though, he would recall all the whispers. All the looks of astonishment, and the few of fear. And even a few of something else. Something that started the reaction.

The looks of disgust.

The first one came from a woman, a Major in the regular force who'd recognised him in the communal showers. The woman hadn't said one word to him, simply glowering for a moment before turning and leaving. Then there was that one private who he'd bumped into in the hall outside the gymnasium. He'd looked completely repulsed by him, and had brushed past without even apologising.

Worse still were the murmurs of the general populace. It seemed he couldn't even enter a room without causing a new rumor. Many of the were harmless, but there were a few that shocked and hurt him to no end. But, in true Edward Elric fashion, he'd dutifully ignored each passing moment of these and continued on his days as usual.

The nights were getting worse, though.

Through these rumors and glances he'd inevitably find himself wishing he had someone to talk to. It had been his mother the first night, and he'd let the tears that he'd refused to cry before his change finally slip from his eyes. He missed her far more than anyone else could even begin to guess at. Al might know, but since he lost all his memories from when he was in that armour... They'd created and destroyed the mockery of life that had taken their mother's image, and the sight of Sloth evaporating before his eyes was still burned into his mind like a festering sore. The same smile that had sent him to bed when he was young, slowly dissolving into nothing...

It was like he'd killed her all over.

The next night, it was Maes Hughes, and he. too, brought unshed tears out of Ed. The man was more like a father to him than his own had been, inviting the brothers into his home, making them a part of his family. Images of Elysia's crying face flickered into his vision, asking why they were burying daddy in the ground. Images of Gracia trying to explain it to her distraught daughter, her own pain locked away so she could be strong for her little girl. _"Why are they burying Daddy?!"_

_Because of me..._

The pain in Winry's eyes when he'd returned. The shock and distrust of her old comrades. Hawkeye's angry, pain-filled eyes. Maria Ross slapping him across the face. Teacher beating some sense into them after they returned from the... Incedent.

Memories that he cherished. Memories he'd rather forget. And the ones he couldn't forget.

Every night, he'd sunk lower and lower, and every morning he'd rise, shower, and lock it all away for the day's work. Al never noticed, nor had anyone else in the office. But the pain was eating him alive, slowly but surely, from the inside.

He rolled over in the bed as the thoughts ran through the cycle again, finally stopping on the other male role model in his former life. Mustang was who had started him down the path to where he was. He certainly didn't blame him, but it would have helped if he could talk to him about this... _Then again,_ a small part of his mind said, _he's probably hit on me, the womanizing bastard..._

Still, he wondered what had become of the Flame Alchemist. Why had he left his crew behind? Was he dead?

Ed shook his head. "Tomorrow..." He whispered to nobody. "I'll find out tomorrow..."

* * *

Ed sighed again, pulling idly at the sleeve of his red coat. Someone had recovered it from the hidden city all those years ago, and it had been on display in the main foyer of the administration wing ever since. Fuhrer Mitchell had gone oout of his way to personally return it to him earlier that week, and he'd finally gotten a day off, and a chance to wear it. It was like having a piece of his old life back, he admitted to himself as he awkwardly pulled his hair into a sloppy ponytail. Dressed all in black and with the old red coat, he almost looked like he had before, with only a few different curves and a new face to tell him otherwise.

He looked back down at his breakfast and decided he wasn't very hungry, pushing it away with another sigh. He again felt the stares of the collective, but pointedly ignored them as he left the mess. Let them talk. He didn't care. It did distract him enough that he didn't see the woman as he turned the corner and walked right into her. "Oh, sorry..."

Ed felt his voice die in his throat. Staring back at him, looking slightly awestruck, were Gracia and Elysia Hughes.

* * *

**A/N:** Hey all. I've finally gotten around to storyboarding all of my fis, and now am ablwe to cconfidently say that I will be updating them all at least once a month. So, R&R like always, and, also like always, Stay Frosty. -E. Red


	7. Avoiding the Problem

**Chapter 6: Avoiding the Problem**

Ed froze in place, watching shocked recognition appear on the face of Gracia Hughes. The instant she saw the red coat and black shirt, she must have known who it was standing before her.

"Edward?" She managed to ask softly after a second, and the petrified blond nodded unthinkingly. "Oh my..." Gracia looked her over again, stunned by the beautiful young woman who had bumped into her.

Nine year old Elysia looked a little confusedly between her mother and Edward. "Big... Sister?" She asked uncertainly.

Ed felt his stomach give a little wobble as Gracia smiled. "Yes, dear. You remember Edward, right?" She didn't really get a chance to say much else, because an instant later, Elysia had flung her arms around Edward's waist. "Big Sister!" She cried, giggling.

A hundred different emotions flooded Ed's body as the child of Maes Hughes hugged him tightly, bouncing up and down ans chattering excitedly. ("And Bigger Brother told me all about you, and then I kinda remembered a little and then-) Another set of arms wrapped gently around his shoulders. "Welcome back, dear." Gracia's voice broke the dam, and Ed let the tears out.

"And now it's my birthday, and Momma says it's your birthday too, so we're gonna have a really big party for both of us!" Elysia said, looking up. "Why are you crying, Big Sister? Are you sad? Did I make you sad? I didn't mean to do it!" Elysia was becoming upset, and Ed let go of Gracia, forcing some calm into his face.

"No, Princess, you didn't." He replied, crouching down slightly to hug the girl properly. "I just missed you, very much... That's all..."

* * *

Al frowned down at the files in front of him. Ed was still out to lunch, so she hadn't seen them yet, thankfully. But he had to re-read them twice to be sure he wasn't imagining them. "What is he thinking?" He muttered, idly scratching at his automail ports.

"Hmm?" Breda looked up from his own work. "What was that, Al?"

"Nothing... Well, nothing important..." Al replied, standing up slowly, still slightly unsteady on his feet. "I've gotta see the Lieutenant Colonel about something, that's all..." Gathering up the files under one arm, he gripped his cane and crossed the office, knocking sharply on the door. "Enter." Came the stiff call from the other side.

Hawkeye had her head buried in a rather large stack of files as Al walked up to her desk. "Sorry to push the issue, but you need to read these." He said, dropping his load on top the cluttered desk. "Because there is no possible way you can really expect me to follow these orders."

His commanding officer had at least the good graces to frown as she scanned the page. "These are direct from the Fuhrer, Alphonse." She said after finishing. "I can't exactly countermand them."

"I won't let him send her away, Ma'am."

Hawkeye sighed, leaning back in her chair. "I know how you feel about this, Alphonse. But there is really very little I can do at this-"

"Uncle Heymans!" A loud cry made them both falter, and they shared a small smile.

"Hey! If it isn't our favorite little interruption!" Breda's voice was just as loud as Elysia's had been. All turned back to Hawkeye, the anger gone from his face.

"We'll finish this discussion another time, Alphonse." Riza said calmly, standing up.

"Edward doesn't find out." Al said firmly, and this was answered by a small nod. "Thank you... Ma'am."

"-And it's Sister's birthday, too!" Elysia's voice made the blood freeze in Al's veins, a look of horror crawling up his face. It had been many years since he'd last remembered Ed's birthday. It was generally forgotten, or pointedly ignored, as it brought too many painful thoughts with it. But now that she was back...

A gentle hand on his shoulder made him flinch, and he looked down into his CO's mildly amused eyes. "Don't worry. We took care of it all." Hawkeye said softly, no hint of a jibe in her voice at all. "I know how you felt about today, so I had Sheska do some shopping for the whole office, yourself included..."

Elysia was bouncing happily in Breda's lap, the much larger man chuckling as she rattled off a dozen sentences in rapid succession. Gracia was standing in the doorway, chatting idly with Sheska and Kain, with a very dazed-looking Ed under one arm. A very dazed, and _upset_ -looking Ed.

Al crossed the office in an instant. "Mrs. Hughes. It's good to see you again."

Gracia smiled and stretched up on her tiptoes to kiss Al on the cheek. "It has been a while, hasn't it, Alphonse..." She said, still holding Edward to her. "And I see you've grown even more since then... Maes would be so proud of you."

The group went quiet, as they always did when certain taboo names were uttered, and that's the only reason Gracia noticed the tiny whimper and almost imperceptible shiver that came from the woman under her arm. Elysia grabbed the attention of the rest of the group the instant they'd fallen quiet, and Gracia took her chance, leading Ed across the office and into Hawkeye's. The blonde CO took one look in her eyes and nodded, closing the door behind the pair. Al tried to push past her, but she put her foot down.

Hard. On his left foot.

"Leave it, Alphonse." She said in a hushed tone. "This is something she needs to do on her own."

* * *

The door had barely closed before he lost his composure. "I Didn't... And there was... And we..." Too many things were dancing in his head. He knew he was babbling, but all the worries, and all the disappointments, and every other thing that he'd been agonizing over for almost a week came shooting to the surface, and he couldn't hold it in.

"Shhh... It's okay...." Gracia sat him down on Hawkeye's couch, and hugged him to her, gently rocking back and forth as he let go. It was inevitable, he guessed, that this would happen. Sooner or later he would have to face many people from his past, people who would stir old memories, ones that should have stayed untouched.

Maes Hughes was one of those memories.

The memory of the man who was killed trying to help him save his brother was one of Ed's most painful, and he could not help but blame himself. And Gracia must have known, because after another moment, she spoke up.

"You can't blame yourself for what happened, Edward." She said softly, stroking his back. "Maes... He always did what he thought was right, regardless of the consequences... It's part of why he was such a good investigator, and part of why I never asked him to leave the military." She sighed sadly, gazing off into space. "He loved you boys. Did you know that? He considered you to be a part of the family, even before you got on that train, all those years ago..."

Ed sobbed even louder at the new information, but Gracia just tisked softly. "And I always did, too. There's nothing else that can be done about what happened, and it's silly of you to blame yourself. We both know that Maes was too stubborn to give up on you, and we both know he would never suggest in the slightest that it was your fault that he was there that night."

No matter how terrible he felt about it, with the awful facts staring him in the face, Ed was force to admit that there wwas nothing he could have done differently. "But... I took him away from you... And Elysia..."

"Shh... You're being silly, dear." Gracia shushed him, and hugged him a little tighter. "There's not a day that goes by that I don't think about him, and miss him. But I know in my heart that he loved me, and that's all that matters. Now let's just take a minute, and calm down, and then we can go out and join the others..."

And that's what they did.

* * *

Somewhere in between his entering and leaving Hawkeye's office, the group had decided to call it quits early for the day, and they all piled into several cars to make the trip to the Hughes household. Ed sat silently in the back of Gracia's car as Elysia rattled off a long string of seemingly disconnected thoughts, staring blankly into space and trying desperately not to cry.

He'd been doing that a lot lately, he noted somewhat bitterly. Somewhere in his head, the image of his former self stood, shaking it's head and telling him to suck it up. But as hard as it tried, he tried just as hard to ignore it. He spent far too long burying his feelings and problems under his goal. That goal had been achieved, and Al was alive, and in the flesh. And now, it all seemed to be rushing out, released from the fenced-off area in her head and heart where he'd locked it away.

Eventually he'd admit that it was a good thing to get it out of his system.

They pulled up to the house and, after a few minutes spent maneuvering the cars off of the road, they piled into the large, and hauntingly empty home. Visions of events long past rose once again in his head, and he grew ever more silent and apprehensive. The rest of the office was swept up in a whirlwind of Elysia's happy thoughts, the young girl bouncing happily between the millitary personnel, who were more than happy to oblige her need for attention.

Ed, on the other hand, kept entirely to himself, wandering through the familliar house, lost in his memories. That old wash basin, and the memory of helping bring Elysia into the world. The chair he spent any number of nights sitting up in, reading because he couldn't fall asleep. The room that was unofficially his and Al's.

So many memories, most of them good, some decidedly not.

It wasn't long before he heard someone coming down the empty hallway after him, and he forced himself to shake his head and clear his thoughts. It was bad enough that Gracia had seen him in such a state. He didn't need it to spread to the whole office.

"Big Sister?"

Huh... He supposed he needn't have worried.

Elysia shuffled her feet as she entered the room, looking a little nervous at interrupting his brooding. He forced a smile as she looked up at him. "Hey, there. Were you looking for me?"

"Momma said to leave you alone, but you're not s'posed to be sad on your birthday!" The girl cried, running across to room and leaping into Ed's arm. "Please don't be sad!"

_Easier said than done..._ "I'll try, Princess..." He said quietly, rubbing her back with his hand.

"Promise?" She sniffled, looking up at him with the beginnings of tears in her eyes.

Ed smiled and gently wiped them away. "I promise." She held on to him for a moment longer, until they heard voices calling for her from down the hall. "Let's go back downstairs." _And try to stay 'happy' this time..._

The younger girl nodded and led the way, both of her small hands clamped firmly around his. A few eyebrows were raised, but nobody said a word as the blond allowed himself to be led around for the rest of the afternoon, a small, odd smile on his face. A pleasant change from the slightly depressed look he knew he'd been wearing, but not a very good deception at all. Not to those that knew him.

But that was fine.

For now.

Finally, after hours that seemed like days, the sun set. Elysia's eyelids started to droop not long after, and Ed lifted her up awkwardly, gently carrying her up the stairs and tucking her gently into her bed. The rest of the office slowly drifted out of the house, making their separate ways home, some along, some not. Eventually, there was only Hawkeye left, and Al had fallen asleep on the couch.

Ed sat by himself in the big armchair in the corner, nursing a warm mug of coffee as he watched Hawkeye and Mrs. Hughes chatting quietly across the room. The two women looked... He couldn't put a word to it. They were so close... There was no tenseness between them. They were just... Open...

The next thing he knew, a large blanket was being draped over him. Gracia's eyes danced with some unearthly light as she tucked him in. "Don't worry. It's just me..."

"Hey... Did I...?"

"Yes. Yes you did..." She smiled, brushing a stray hair back behind Ed's ear. "Don't worry about it, though. Just go back to sleep. Oh, and Winry called the office. Your arm will be here in two days."

"Tha's good..." He felt himself slipping back to sleep, and was surprised by a soft, light kiss on his forehead.

"Sleep well, Edward."

* * *

Riza slumped into her bed, physically and emotionally drained. The orders she'd received that morning hung over her head like an angry cloud. But they _were_ orders from the Fuhrer...

She rolled over, ignoring, as always, the itchy feeling of the cheap military blankets on her skin. Alphonse had already expressed his concern, quite clearly, and she happened to agree with him. Truth be told, she hated even having Edward there. Not back, certainly, but at the office.

The wayward alchemist had been back for less than a month, in a strange new body, and without an arm. Adjusting to people who thought him... Her... "Ugh..." She shook her head. The mixing pronouns was almost as bad as the rest of the situation.

And worse still, nobody in the office knew how to react to... Her, for lack of a better term. She wasn't the same Edward that they had lost all those years ago. She was quiet and reserved, where he was loud and boisterous. She was shy, where he was overt. And she was humble, where he was all ego. Outwardly, at least...

She turned over again, trying to get rid of the lump she felt forming in her gut. _This isn't right..._

She knew what was going on. Edward, in her own, backwards way, was trying to bury her own feelings. Gracia had seen it immediately, and she had seen it herself, though she hadn't really understood it until she'd seen those orders.

The Fuhrer wanted to _use_ her. Not for evil. Not like Bradley. But to further his own gain.

Just like Roy...

She shook her head violently. "Not tonight..." _Let's not go down that road..._

Still... What to do about these orders...?

She sighed. _This is going to be a long night..._

_

* * *

_

A/N: Sorry for the delay. Summer was horrible, and I've only just begun writing FFs again. I'm trying to get my mind back onto the plot of a few stories, so there may be some continued delays... Rest assured that I have no intentions of abandoning a stroy until it is finished. R&R, and, as is our custom, Stay Frosty. -E. Red


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